About this site

The idea

Most writing in this field falls into one of three modes. It is clinical, in which case it is accurate and unreadable. It is coy, in which case it says nothing at any length. Or it is crude, in which case it is entertaining and useless. The gap between those modes is where almost everybody actually lives, and it is where this site is written.

The organising metaphor is a map. Pleasure is treated as a country with regions, routes and field notes, because that is a more honest structure than a ranked list of tips. Regions are wide territories: solo, together, body, gear and care. Guides are walked routes through one subject each. Tools are reference tables, meant to be consulted rather than read. Notes are essays with no instruction in them at all.

Editorial standards

Five rules are applied to every page.

• Say the specific thing. Not that people vary, but what varies and why. Not that lubricant matters, but what silicone lubricant does to a silicone toy at a molecular level and why the damage cannot be undone.
• State the uncertainty. Where the evidence is genuinely unsettled, as with the anatomy behind the g spot, the page says what has been found, what has not, and where the disagreement sits. Confidence is not manufactured to make a page read better.
• No fabricated authority. There are no invented experts, no fake credentials, no testimonials and no statistics that cannot be stood behind. Where a figure would be shaky, the point is made qualitatively instead.
• Adults, not shock. The subject is treated seriously and sensually, without explicit erotica and without the nudge and wink that makes so much writing in this field unusable.
• Not a clinic. Nothing here is medical advice. Pain that persists, bleeding, or any change that seems abnormal belongs with a clinician. Medical management, rehabilitation programmes and diagnosis are outside what an editorial guide should attempt.

What is deliberately absent

There is no shop, no basket and no product catalogue. Where a category of object is discussed, it is discussed as a category, with the properties that make one example better than another, so that the reasoning transfers to whatever is actually in front of a reader.

There are no images. Every visual element on the site is drawn in code: the contour lines are inline vector graphics, the rules are dashed borders, and the compass on the front page is a set of coordinates rather than a picture. That keeps the pages fast and means nothing is loaded from anywhere else.

There is no tracking. No analytics, no cookies, no third party scripts, no fonts loaded from another server. A page here makes no requests beyond the site itself, which is stated plainly on the privacy page and the cookies page.

Who it is for

Adults who want a straight answer, delivered in a register that is neither a consultation nor a leer. That includes people entirely new to the subject, who will find the field guides written without assumed knowledge, and people who already know the territory, who will find the reference tables more useful than another introduction.

Corrections

Accuracy matters more than tone here, and factual corrections are welcome. A page that gets something wrong is a page worth fixing, and a specific correction with a reason attached is more useful than a general complaint. The address is on the contact page.

Everything published is listed on the map, which is the fastest way to see the shape of the site in one screen.